rabbit afloatWhen the Rowing Rabbit goes a-drinking, he normally expects to wake up with a fuzzy head and memories of champagne in Fawley Bar... Not this time...

For Rabbit woke up in a strange bunk on a 72ft yacht with memories of tall handsome sailors, tales of 60 foot waves, 10 month voyages, tots of rum, freeze-dried boil-in-the-bag lettuce, and a suspicion that he'd just been press-ganged!

Yes dear readers, the rabbit is off to sail around the world as part of "The Toughest Yacht Race" - see www.globalchallenge2004.com - and become a rufty-tufty circumnavigator on board yachts "VAIO" and "Me to You".

But don't worry, for while he is off on the open seas Celebrity Ship's Cat from Team VAIO (www.kunachi.com) will take over reporting duties. Whilst the Cat is a little too large to do the classic "cleavage" shots, it is looking forward to the high life.

Watch this space for Rabbit-Updates...

16-09-04 OU-FFENSIVE
The Oxford University Lightweights are already well known for their attempts to stretch the bounds of lycra 'fashion' to new lows, however their latest creation -- as sported at the recent Ilan intercollegiate regatta in Taiwan (regatta.ilc.edu.tw/english/s2.htm) -- reaches new depths even by their own previous standards, and makes both the IC camouflage and London Hawaiian all-in ones of the past seem quite tasteful..

OULRC wearing nasty lycraAs the slug knows that those of you who like to keep at the cutting edge of rowing fashion will want to see just how far the target has dropped, so you know what you've now got to out-do, we're delighted to bring you the attached photo, showing the lycra in the classic "which way to the beach" pose. (There are also more pictures on the website above...)

don't try this at home kids... (please)

Sadly, there are somethings in this world that just won't lie down and die, and unfortunately Tideway Navigation is one of them...

The latest news is that the new boss man at the PLA would quite like to do away with the Bye-laws for rowing and have only the international rules of navigation apply below Richmond lock. His intentions, no doubt arising from a admirable desire to remove confusion and simplify things for all river users.

Apparently the PLA have arranged for a study to be carried out by the Salvage Association and will accept whatever they recommend - and, as a sport, we'll just have to go along with the outcome, like it or not.

Part of the problem, is the perception that there have been a lot of incidents caused by rowing boats, a perception that may not reflect reality as some gin palace people and some pleasure boat people seem to put in PLA incident reports about nothing, whereas, due to the legendary apathy of the rowing population - we tend not to complain when we probably should.
(ask yourself, do you even know how to start about complaining?, do you know the current rules well enough to point out when you're in the right and the cruiser is in the wrong? )

Anyway - the PLA's consultation document is available for review below - though be aware, this may not be the final version. On the plus side, input is invited from everybody so it might be time to shrug off that apathy for once and voice an educated opinion...


Finally, the study starts mid September, so now would be a, VERY GOOD TIME to ensure all coaches, coxswains and steerspeople rowing on the Tideway are fully knowlegable about the existing rules (http://www.ara-rowing.org/coaching/tideway2.php). If we don't have our own house in order we'll have nobody to blame but ourselves.

Watch this space...

The fallout from the LRC cycling pub crawl continues.

After sliming up to a contact who is a probationer in London's finest, The Metropolitan police, we can reveal that at least some of the Bellendery of that now mythical day did not escape the attention of the long arm of the law.

The four officers involved were patrolling near Furnivall Gardens in plain clothes (which apparently is standard practice in the Met for groups larger than two). To set the scene, there were two probationers and two older constables. As a group of cyclists cycled past within 20 yrds of them, the exchange between them went something like this:

Copper1 to Probationer1: Did you see that?
Probationer1 to Copper 1: What?
Copper1: That group of cyclists, one of the women is exposing herself.
Probationer1: What shall we do?
Copper1: Well strictly speaking of course, we should apprehend her and at the very least caution her, if not arrest her for indecent exposure. And actually the males with her dont look like they are in a state be in charge of bicycles.
Probationer1: Right lets go!!!!!
Copper1: Can you really be bothered to chase down a bunch drunks on bikes? You really have got a lot to learn about this job sonny...............
Probationer: It's my duty to report that I am known to two of the males in the group.................they are rowers (as if this explained the situation)
Constable1: Well even more reason not to bother then............nice pair on the lass too.

Good to know the boys and girls in blue can exhibit a degree of discretion to rowing bods who have been let loose from the rigours of training...

For those who want to know, the two reprebates who the copper recognised were (surprise surprise) Uncle Sanchez and, of course, the Briga dier...

06-09-04 BAH HAMBURG
In Germany for the annual bad-behaviour fest that is FISA world Masters, one rower was apparently less than impressed with his accomodation for the weekend.

Mad Colin from Tyrian (aka the UL oldboys) is reported to have stormed out of his hotel in Hamburg on Friday, after discovering that his bed was an iron four poster job - - with handcuff attachment points...

It is unclear whether Colin rushed off to find a 'friend' to share it with, a large bottle of disinfectant, or alternative lodgings but we suspect the latter... As for the rest of the Tyrian posse? Well, they seemed content with staying in a brothel with a very "gay proprietor".

Suggestions that the establishment was recommended by one Andy Knee-Robinson are as yet uncomfirmed.

Elsewhere at the regatta, a certain well known female veteran member of Sons of the Thames allegedly missed the party on Saturday night, after receiving an invitation to the Croation embassy... Only to be seen the following morning wearing a croatian one piece...

explains a lot... **sigh**

Elite Athletes Can Rapidly Fall Out of Shape

sewage in Thames cartoonPerfect for all those rowers out there who like moaning and crave attention... (i.e. elite men)

BBC TV London is interested in contacting any Tideway rowers who think they have felt or are feeling ill-effects from the sewage outfall. (note that's SEWAGE INDUCED ILLNESS, not BEER INDUCED ILLNESS - ED)

This request ties in with the recently announced inquiry into sewage-induced illness, so anyone who finds they fall ill over the winter or even next year is also asked to get in touch.

Just e-mail gareth.furby@bbc.co.uk



The nice people at Thames Tradesmen RC have recently started a regular e-mail newsletter for all old, not so old and young Tradesmen, but they have lost contact with lots of old members and would be happy to hear from them again...

So if you once boated from Castle Greyskull, haven't received the newsletter because they don't have your current email address, and you want to receive this rag, sorry publication, . please fill in the form on the right and hit submit.

A nice alternative shot of the coxless IV at the award ceremony - watch out for the way James Cracknell steathfully dispatches his flower arrangements at the start (must be the hay fever poor dear, he did the same thing at Sydney)

(n.b. 9mb file.. don't attempt to watch unless you're on broadband)

dog sitting in the boatPicture the scene, it's Oxford City Regatta and the Barnes Bridge Ladies Novice coxed 4 has just beaten Abingdon, but stern pair are complaining that there seemed to be a lack of power coming from bow pair.

Upon closer inspection, the reason for the lack of power was reveaaed - as, encouraged by Charlotte in the bow seat, a dog had jumped into their boat!!! (see picture on right)

Charlotte it appears is a bit of an animal lover having previously insisted one of the club boats backed down through a bridge in order to rescue a pigeon that had fallen into the river... (probably after being shot by someone at Quintin - ahem)

When asked to explain her actions, she replied "we aren't just good-looking, kick arse rowers, but like every good lady, don't know much about the gold standard but love fluffy animals..."