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LEAST FAVOURITE THINGS
Dedicated to Thames Water & the Environment Agency
(With apologies to Julie Andrews and all Tideway rowers)

Giardia on bottles and condoms on rudders
infected blisters and sewage that bubbles
Little white pads that canít fly but have wings
These are a few of my least favourite things

Cryptosporidiosis (look that up on google)
foul smelling lumps that resemble dead poodles,
Trees that are littered with used tampon strings
These are a few of my least favorite things

Escherichia coli and Campylobacter
trolleys and driftwood race plans never factor
Raw sewage discharges we must condemn
All this and more when you row on the Thames

When the crab bites
When the scull flips
When I've swallowed my fill
I simply remember the proposed improvements to the Thames sewage system in 2020
And then I don't feel so ill

ahem...

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